Jessica Alba is medieval nurse 'Foxy' assigned to King Arthur (Ted Danson) with whom she's desperately in love.
In a moment of passion, she brutally murders King Arthur's wife, Guinevere (Chantelle off Big Brother).
However, Foxy doesn't realise that she's been seen committing the murder by Lancelot (Mark Bright).
To avoid a certain death-penalty, Foxy is forced into becoming Lancelot's slave and performing all sorts of depraved acts including getting bummed repeatedly by Lancelot and an ancient dwarven race, who all look like Emlyn Hughes.
In another scene Lancelot is seen taunting Foxy with a picture of Hayden Christensen, before shooting his load into a large potato - which Foxy is then forced to eat from the bum-crack of an Emlyn Hughes lookalike dwarf.
Eventually Foxy kills Lancleot with a hair pin she finds in her hair that she'd forgotten about and rushes to King Arthur where she confesses all.
King Arthur forgives her and agrees to marry her.
The guests at the wedding include Norm, Woody, Coach, Frazier and Cliffy the postman.
The dwarves are fed to King Arthur's pet donkeys and watervoles as part of the evening entertainment.
They all live happily ever after.
The End.
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